


Can't Seem to Count Sheep

by temperature_is_fake



Category: Green Eggs and Ham (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Tenderness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-18 07:50:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21507703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/temperature_is_fake/pseuds/temperature_is_fake
Summary: Sam needs to sleep. EB just wants milk. In the end, it's Guy who needs help.
Relationships: E.B. & Sam I Am (Green Eggs and Ham), Guy Am I/Michellee (Green Eggs and Ham), Guy Am I/Sam I Am (Green Eggs and Ham)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 108





	1. EB makes a discovery

**Author's Note:**

> I'm upping the number of GEaH fics on here from 17 to 18.

“Hey Sam” EB whispered as she stepped into the lounge room.

“AHH-oh EB, it’s only you!” Sam laughed. He was sitting on a counter stool, staring out the window. It was a moonlit night, but only barely, and EB could just make out the frown from his staring.

“I just wanted a drink of pink milk” “Oh, go right ahead! I love pink milk. It's especially good at night”

EB plodded over to the fridge, grabbing her prize, but she couldn’t help thinking about what she’d seen in his eyes. _Sadness_ she thought _and wistfulness too. Well, there must be_ something _that I can do._

“Are you okay? Why are you up so late?” she questioned.

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just couldn’t sleep. I keep thinking about stuff and couldn’t seem to count sheep. Plus, it’s difficult to sleep with Guy snoring next to me.” He chuckled, then as EB went to gulp her pink milk, murmured softly “Not that I wouldn’t do that every day, if he’d just see”.

“Wait was that?” EB asked. “WHAT, OH NOTHING. Nothing at all, we’re all good over here!” Sam panicked, thinking of a way to mislead her. Unfortunately, EB was a master truth-seeker.

“I thought you said something about sleeping next to Guy-oh. Sam.” EB looked at him with eyes full of pity. Yet again, nothing had missed she. She could see, clear as day, what he meant by that statement. Though Sam would rather run away than face it.

“Sam, do you…do you like Guy?” she asked cautiously, with all the compassion a ten year old could muster.

“No EB. No I don't.” “Oh. Uh. Never mind then I guess” she shifted on her feet. The room felt awkward, and was quiet to beat.

“EB. I think... I think I’m in love with him”

“OH! Well that’s great news! When are you going to tell him? Let me help you plan it out!”

“EB, I’m not going to tell him. I’m never going to tell him. Guy’s got your mom, and she’s got you. That’s all there is to it! There’s no more room here for some kinda... whozit.”

“You’re not a whozit, Sam! You’re part of our family! Without you, we’d never have met and then where would we be?” EB exclaimed.

“EB it’s late, you should just go to bed. I’ll be fine on my own, go drink your pink milk instead”

“But Sam-” “No, EB. Go to sleep” She stared at him shocked – he was the only one of her parents, ah, _family_ _friends_ , to never “go off”. She recovered quickly, blinking away tears. She would go to bed tonight with several new fears. “Fine! I’ll go. I can’t make you do _anything_ you don’t want to do!”

And unfortunately Guy, that includes _you._


	2. Guy Wasn't Asleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guy stirs on the couch as EB and Sam argue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen. I'm big gay. And I WILL write tender. But I cannot write kissing bc i have A) never been kissed and B)I don't have a boyed friend so i'm out here w no one to stop me combusting from Too Much Tender,  
> Sixteen almost 17 yr old should be doing HW but lmao whtvr.

Guy stirred on the couch after EB and Sam spoke, hearing at first “ugh, I’m a joke”.

He had heard half their conversation, only what was needed for this story's peak to be truly completed. 

He shifted so slightly to his left to listen, too tired and weak for Sam’s meaning to set in.

Ten minutes pass, with Sam only sighing and telling himself “I just can’t keep lying, to myself or the others".

"I'm. I'm in love with Guy. And he's going to leave me, like all the rest. Obviously."

Sam moved off his stool and made to lie down on the other couch when Guy turned abruptly around.

"AH! What the-oh, it's you. That's the second time that's happened to me tonight! What a coincidence!" Sam whisper-shouted.

"Sorry about scaring you. I heard talking and woke up"

“Guy?" Sam whispered, “I’m just going to bed. You don't need to sit up”

“Sam…” Guy paused “Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course Briefcase Buddy! What’s up?” Sam responded, the picture of happiness. There was no trace of his barely-an-argument with EB, or the topics brought up in it.

“Sam I uh. Do you. Do you like me?” “Of course I like you, silly! We’re briefcase buddies!”

“You know what I mean, Sam"

Sam’s response was immediate and quiet, “You heard us before, didn’t you?”

“I did”

“I’m sorry.”

“Sam?”

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorryI’msorryI’msorry” Sam was shaking, clutching his pillow. 

Guy stared, completely at a loss. _Does Sam think I'll be..._ mad _at him?_ Five seconds later, Guy recovered, already murmuring to Sam.

“Sam, oh _no_ , no, don’t freak out, I’m not angry! You’re okay Sam, I’m not leaving” Guy kept up a stream of words, moving quickly across the room to Sam. “Can I hug you?”

Sam nodded, barely perceptible. Wrapping his arms around him, Guy held him close til the shaking eased off. It could have be minutes, or hours.

Guy began to talk softly “I don’t want you to panic again but I've got to tell you this, I've kept it to myself for too long. Sam I. I really _like_ you. More than I have any other person before. I’m _not_ leaving, and I’m not letting you go that easily.”

“But, but... what about Michellee?” “She’s got EB, and I never said I didn’t like her too. I love her. I just... love you differently. I want to-I don’t know, it’s probably stupid but. I want to date you both. There. I said it. I like you both and I want to date _both_ of you.”

“You… You _what?_ ” Sam squirmed around in Guy’s grip, turning to face him. Guy's face was red, and he was staring at his shoulder.

“If I’ve completely misinterpreted this situation, I’ll just go back to that giant crater we found and bury myself, but I don’t think I am. If you don’t want to, that’s fine, but Michellee brought it up weeks ago with me, asking me if I liked you- _like that_ and I couldn’t lie to her. She’s okay with it, and so am I. It’s up to you, Sam. We’ll be Briefcase Buddies all the same”

Sam perked up a little, laughing ever so slightly. “Didn’t that crater get filled with toxic waste?”

“Oh. Yeah. It did. Never mind that idea then. Maybe I’ll go live with Mr Jenkins and save myself the embarrassment”

“I... I don’t think you should be embarrassed. I. I do like you. I _love_ you Guy. And I love your inventions and your ideas and I especially love this one. Though I don't really like the one about moving in with Mr Jenkins. Or burying yourself in that crater. I think your family would prefer you stayed here, with us. With…. With me.” Sam gazed at Guy. He quicked segued into giving Guy an out “But if you’ve changed your mind that’s completely fine too of course! Haha”.

“Sam. Listen to me very closely when I say this. I’m never, _ever_ changing my mind about you.”

“Oh. _Oh.”_

 _"_ Yeah, _oh_. Can we kiss now?" 

"Oh, _Guy,_ so _forward_! How scandalous!" Sam laughed in falsetto. 

Guy tilted Sam's head up. "May I?"

"Always, Briefcase Buddy"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tired and gay boys!! tired and gay!!! (to the tune of "smile and wave boys" from the penguins of Madagascar)


End file.
